Losing the plot

So who would've thought not being able to exercise due to a totally stupid injury would affect me so badly. I have well and truly fallen off the wagon and fallen apart. I'm not sure how to kick my arse back on the wagon but I really need too before this spirals out of control. Been out of action for 4 weeks already and been told its another 3 months yet of therapy then and only then can i start to introduce my exercise classes back into my life. 3 months? the thought of it has totally crushed my motivation. Then being told it could be three years before I'm pain free has sent me into a chaotic whirlwind of destruction. But.......I know where I have gone wrong and I'm trying to drag myself back into the zone. Have cooked on mass today and planned all weekly meals and fingers crossed for a loss this time next week. Avoid the cakes avoid the chocolate and avoid the bread (as my psoriasis is now coming back with a vengeance too) who'd a thunk a bad week could affect your body so much. Feeling crap crap crap.

11 week plateau creates negative motivation But I will beat you

Well 11 weeks Ive been at this plateau........... weights not going down inches aren't going down only thing down is my mood. Well I have had a lot of thinking to do over the last few days. Advice from friends and personal instructors has helped me to realise where i am I'm my head space and where I actually want to be in my life. Last night saw a new me emerge. I was at bootcamp and the fabby instructor came out at the end of the session with some very fancy scales. Tracking body mass, body fat, muscle mass and a couple of other groovy things.
My results although not great did confirm to me that actually I am doing the right thing and even tho the numbers aren't moving I'm improving in other ways.
My muscle mass should be at 30% and I'm currently at 26% so not too much further to go. Yay My body fat should be at between 25/30% I'm at 43% but last time i had this checked over 12 months ago i was at 57% its all good. from the calculations he took he also told me that I need to lose 2st4lb of actual fat. He also told me that I perhaps will never weight the 8st or 10st that WW tells me I should be for my height etc as I have a very high bone density. In his terms this means that I could effectively be 13st with 20-25% body fat and look slim and lean whereas someone else could be 13st with a body fat of 45% and they would look like they need to lose 5st. He told me basically to stop worrying about the numbers on the scales and concentrate on my nutrition.
I have been armed with loads of information and help sheets. I don't wanna say anything bad about WW as I do love the whole programme and have met the most amazing people during my 12months doing it,  but for me with the amount of training I'm doing and the way I want to live my life its just not very compatible with my body. I have found myself just filling up my points with crap....eating my dailies very nutritious and not making very good food choices with my extras and weeklies whereas now with the calorie counting and the nutrition watching I'm more aware of what my body needs on the days it needs it.
Tomorrow is WI day and fingers crossed I have done enough to at least shift a lb or 2.
On the up side too I popped into the shop today mooching around for something to wear for a night out next week and came across the most amazing dress. Only 2 left a 16 and an 18.......its a chiffon kinda material so knew i would need the 18 but when i put it on i wasn't overly convinced that I would liek it but i did i really really liked it so I bought it........

so i went clothes shopping I found something I tried it on in the shop and I liked myself in it.........all in all a good day the big test was when i got home trying on with the shoes and tights would i love it then?

Well OMG did I ever I love it i looked so slim and girly and felt amazing, even had a wee tear,cant wait to go out next week now to road test it with my friends........most of whom I haven't seen in a long time so may not recognise me lol.

68lbs of Fat

Hmmm its hard to imagine I have lost 68 of these yes 68. I concentrate so hard on the 70+ I still have to lose that I forget about the achievements I have already made. 12 months ago losing 1 of these was a challenge in itself but look how far I have come look at all I have achieved and look at the Amazing person I am becoming. This year is all about ME and the person I want to be and the life I want to have. Not the life others think I should have or the life other people have that I want....My weight loss is about me and nobody else. It is also about the amazing friends I have made along the way and who have helped me to lose 68 of those lill blighters.
I'm loving WW and I'm loving life again.

Inspiring Words of Wisdom

OK well today was nearly a blip after feeling quite hungry today I managed to avert a binge crisis. What was even better was I checked my WW5 group on Facebook and a lovely lady had posted some inspiring ideas (see below) that made me think about things and turn my binge on its head. Thank you to Helen Scholler for a wonderful post and to all the other amazing WW'ers that do an amazing job everyday to keep others motivated and keep themselves on the straight and narrow. Who said losing weight had to be a lonely path to be walked alone........trust me there are so many of us out there just waiting to help out another fat buster on their way to success.

1. Don’t eat what you don’t need.
2. Stop doing what doesn’t work.
3. In most instances, the solution is you.
. 4. Getting offended is optional. As is getting off your arse. See how that works?
5. Changing fifty things at once is a bad plan.
6. Knowing isn’t doing. Do more.
7. Joining a gym isn’t attending a gym.
8. Being smart is not the same as doing smart.
9. Intentions aren’t actions. Stop intending.
10. You won’t undo three decades of bad choices in three weeks. Be realistic.
11. Be more committed to success than comfort.
12. Control your controllables and let go of the rest

NEW BOOTCAMP!!!!! proved my point

So anyone who has ever been overweight will know all about what I'm about to say. You know when you start a new exercise class and the PT instructor gives you that LOOK  you know the one I mean?........"the ha ha ha she is having a laugh" look "she will never make it through my class" look. Well that is exactly the look I got. Friday bootcamp.... I walked up to the door feeling very paranoid looking at the skinny minnies surrounding me and thinking OMG what am I doing? Got to the door and the PT stood there looking at me waiting for his money.......I got that look as he took my money and had a sly smile to himself.
He was young fit and slim and ex army.......I started to panic a little but I thought no your not going to get to me I am going to prove you wrong.....and I did just that.
I made it thought his rigorous circuit training........I ran round the room carrying a weighted back pack and i sprinted as though my life depended upon it.
Do you know what? I had the biggest reward of all at the end of the session..........The PT guy made a point of walking towards me and took my hand shook it and told me I had done very well and how impressed he was with me. Even asked if I was coming back the next week....Well Of course I am
It is so easy for people to misjudge a large person and their fitness he certainly did but the fact that he made a point of talking to me at the end really made me feel good.

No More Plateau

Well after yesterdays WI and an unjust 2lb gain I have decided to change tack. I am now going to eat half the amount of Ap(activity points ) I earn in a day on the day i earn them. I am going to eat my weeklies on the days i dont exercise and maybe a cpl of extras on the days I do.

After a shocking WI and an even more shocking 10 week plateau I need to kick this in the butt. I am weighing food like a mad woman and nothing goes pass my lips without it being pointed and written down. If I cannot shift this plateau in the next 2 weeks then its off to the docs I go as It may be something medical.

I have tried everything over the last few weeks and the only thing I and others can think of is that I am perhaps not eating enough and my body is going into starvation. Well that is ONE thing I never ever thought I would say is THAT IM NOT EATING ENOUGH.........well actually there are two things i never thought I would say the second is OMG THERE IS A NEW EXERCISE CLASS WHO'S UP FOR IT lol

I LURRRVVVVEEEEE THE NEW ME  hears to 2012 and the next 5stone

New weekly goals

So I have decided to add an extra lill goal or task for each week to help keep me focused and give me something to work on.

1.   Drink more water

2.   Step up the exercise, duration and intensity

3.   Limited to One portion or carbohydrates per day

4.   Try a new recipe

5.   Try a food I never thought you would eat

6.   Start the couch to 5k training

7.   Eat 3 different pieces of fruit per day

8.   Pamper day- intense hair condition, facial, total body moisturize, manicure, pedicure

9.   30 wall push ups per day

10. 30 sit ups per day